Elvis Has Left the Building

Many of my friends and family know that I've been struggling with the whole work life balance for a while. Particularly as my eldest started kindergarten. Even though I had a great job and a boss who was very flexible, I just didn't feel like I had the time I needed to do the 'kid stuff' and I just didn't want to look back and wish I had tried to make this happen.

So I decided to take the leap.

I now work for myself. Well really I work for Koenig Inc. (actually the IRS knows me as Kimberly Koenig Media) which includes a very bossy 3 year old and a sensitive 5 year old. And a husband who is incredible, but maybe needs to have the clothes hamper moved right next to his side of the bed. I'm just saying.

As my employment drew to a close and yesterday morning as we got everyone loaded in the car for school/pre school drop offs- there was much crying about ridiculous things, like no you can't take the magic wand to school and please will you use some words instead of grunts. I took the tactic that some Mom had confessed to me at an earlier date, and turned my hip hop music to ear bleeding level to 'freeze' them out. I danced in my seat, I sang.. I ignored whatever whining/crying was coming from the back seat. And I panicked. What in the hell was I doing? I was choosing to do THIS full time? This is the meaningful time together? I'm afraid I might find myself shouting 'no more wire hangers' soon...

Today as my eyes are puffy and I am prone to fits of nostalgic and fear riddled crying, my youngest climbed into my lap (at my new home office desk) and said to me "Mommy, my heart says I love you". And she squeezed me. And I squeezed her.

Here we go.