Headline: Pseudo SuperMom Implodes

**Warning - Negative Nelly rant below.

Today, this week, I cannot do it. I am going to wallow in some self pity for a moment and just go off on all the shit that Moms, 'working' Moms, basically Mom's in general have to deal with.
It's too much. Seriously. Too much to keep track of, keep clean, keep fed, 'keeping up', the whole thing.

Yes, I chose to have children and of course I enjoy them, love them, am happy I have a family blah blah blah... but dude, some times I really just want to get in my car and drive away for a long weekend, or month, or a year in Italy. But then that would mean I would have a bigger pile of laundry when I get back, so it's probably not worth it.

I choose to be a working Mom. I struggle with this choice all the time, especially when like tonight my daughter was very last kid there when I picked her up. And she was eating a chocolate rice krispy treat. And then wouldn't eat my forking 'pink pancakes' for dinner. (fortified with protein and veggies, but you totally can't even tell they taste awesome.)

I'm tired of thinking of stuff to make for dinner that is healthy and won't take me back to the big girl jeans and that my kids will eat at least one element of and of course that doesn't take more than 1/2 an hour to prepare. I'm tired of battling at bedtime and bathtime and wanting to scream at my daughter because she's using the most rude voice (because hello - can you say pot calling kettle black?) Or remembering as I'm rushing to get back on the computer (praying that we have a connection tonight - thanks a lot for making my life hell Comcast) rushing to finish the work I didn't get to because I have to run out of my office at 5:02PM so my daughter isn't the only kid left at school. Oh wait, that didn't work.

Remembering that I was going to make baked potatoes tonight so that we could have them for dinner tomorrow night. Because baked potatoes are way better from the oven than the microwave. Oh and that if there's any prayer for me to remember to put dinner in the crock pot tomorrow, I'll have to take it out tonight. And when I"m remembering all this I go back out to the kitchen that still has dishes and crumbs and toys and barrettes and muffins left out. Even though my husband was nice and did clean up the dishes from the dinner no one ate.

So then that sets off the stomping tirade (from me, not the toddlers). Why does no one else in my house (or in the male species apparently) have my same sense of cleanliness? It stresses me out to have crap lying all over the counters and I want to SMASH the stupid phone and it's cord and the keys and card keys that lay all over the counter each night. (Note to self, remember for 18th time to order that phone cord do hickey holder thing that looks like something in a Pottery Barn ad.)

So then I'll be making the lunch for school which my child will eat very little of and making sure the bookbag is by the door, complete with little notes next to each book proving we read them. And changing the laundry out. And mailing a birthday card to that relative. And responding to the invitation to that other birthday party. And finding out that I put the wrong date on the Baby Shower invites for my sister and she's not sure she can get me the phone numbers of her friends so I can call and fix it for them. And knowing I can't go to bed until I put that other huge pile of laundry away because what if I die in a car accident tomorrow and my friends and family come to my house and it's a total pig stye And packing a bag for the gym so I can try and get a work out in this week. And fall asleep reading the two different multiple page 'newsletters' from each of the girls schools after I make notes to put all the pertinent dates in my calendar so I don't miss the parent teacher conference. Like I did today.

I'm done. I quit. This Pseudo SuperMom's Powers are gone. However, I'd like to keep the cape.