Deep breathing.. not letting others dictate the nature of my day... in through the nose.. out through the mouth....
People can be nice. People can be weird. People can be just plain RUDE. Especially when it comes to driving. This morning as I was driving to work, I stopped at a 4 way stop waiting to turn right in a neighborhood section of town. Beginning to cross the street where I would turn, I see what appears to be a homeless man, with TWO BROKEN FEET. As he starts his slow hobble.. I groan. Greeaaat... But I wait patiently. I mean jeez, the guy has two broken feet and probably no stable source of food or shelter.. I'll let him have the extra minute.
As I'm patiently waiting, some bitty with long dark hair in a light teal Honda Civic (did you CHOOSE that car?) decides that she will not follow the RIGHT OF WAY rule that dictates it is MY turn to go through the intersection and bolts thru. Practically taking out homeless broken foot man. First I'm bugged because did you not see the man has TWO BROKEN FEET and second, IT WAS MY TURN. No really. I was AT THE INTERSECTION BEFORE YOU SHOWED UP.
So then I'm fired up and make my right hand turn to follow this ugly rude car and make sure she is enjoying her usurped right of way. Funny how when the kids are in the car, the potty mouth words sometimes slip out.. but when I'm alone.. I sign language the word RUDE angrily so she can see it in her rear view mirror. (Really? What IS that?)
She turns right a block before I do... and as I secretly try to race to beat her to the next intersection, find myself behind a bus. That is behind a garbage truck. That is stopped to pick up garbage. Alright, alright.. let the rude car go.....
I'll put some hope in karma.
Happy Monday!
Monday, May 18, 2009
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Dog Poop Etiquette and Other Things That Keep Me Up
Jeff often says that he is boggled by the things I spend time thinking about. I can't help it. I just see stuff and it makes me think and then that takes me to another thought... and yes, I have a hard time sleeping. (Unless it's finale night of a great show and them I'm out early. What gives?)
Driving home the other night with the girls, I see a woman walking her dog in a neighborhood. Her dog stops to take a poop on a very nicely groomed lawn. I'm pretty positive it was not the dog's lawn. Yes, yes, the woman was responsible and had her little plastic sack poised to snatch up the poo after her dog finished (I can't help but wonder, does this make dogs think they are in charge when we follow after them picking up their crap? Okay, just a side note.) But if I were the home owner with the nice lawn, I'd be bugged. It's my lawn and I don't want your dog's poop on my lawn. Regardless as to whether or not you pick it up afterwards.
I personally currently do not have a dog. I like dogs, I grew up with dogs, I'd like to eventually get a dog, but I'm lazy. I don't want to have to do 'dog patrol' in the backyard or redo the hardwoods after they've been tapdanced on by little dog nails, or sweep and vacuum more, or pay more vet bills. I'd rather just host my family's dogs a few times a year instead. But the point is, I like dogs and I get that dogs have to poop.
So then this morning I see the SAME scenario. Different neighborhood, different dog and different owner..but the dog is clearly taking his morning constitutional on someone else's lawn. Yes, diligent owner is waiting to pick it up. But I just don't like this. I don't think this is okay! I don't even let my girls walk on our neighbor's yards in our neighborhood, much less fertilize. It's not your property. It's rude. It makes spots in your lawn.
Am I alone in this? Do I not 'get it' because we've never owned a dog that we had to walk for it to get exercise? Pooping on other people's lawns - not okay in my book.
Phew.. now I can let that one go.
Driving home the other night with the girls, I see a woman walking her dog in a neighborhood. Her dog stops to take a poop on a very nicely groomed lawn. I'm pretty positive it was not the dog's lawn. Yes, yes, the woman was responsible and had her little plastic sack poised to snatch up the poo after her dog finished (I can't help but wonder, does this make dogs think they are in charge when we follow after them picking up their crap? Okay, just a side note.) But if I were the home owner with the nice lawn, I'd be bugged. It's my lawn and I don't want your dog's poop on my lawn. Regardless as to whether or not you pick it up afterwards.
I personally currently do not have a dog. I like dogs, I grew up with dogs, I'd like to eventually get a dog, but I'm lazy. I don't want to have to do 'dog patrol' in the backyard or redo the hardwoods after they've been tapdanced on by little dog nails, or sweep and vacuum more, or pay more vet bills. I'd rather just host my family's dogs a few times a year instead. But the point is, I like dogs and I get that dogs have to poop.
So then this morning I see the SAME scenario. Different neighborhood, different dog and different owner..but the dog is clearly taking his morning constitutional on someone else's lawn. Yes, diligent owner is waiting to pick it up. But I just don't like this. I don't think this is okay! I don't even let my girls walk on our neighbor's yards in our neighborhood, much less fertilize. It's not your property. It's rude. It makes spots in your lawn.
Am I alone in this? Do I not 'get it' because we've never owned a dog that we had to walk for it to get exercise? Pooping on other people's lawns - not okay in my book.
Phew.. now I can let that one go.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Inadvertent Social Experiment?
With kids, our weekends are packed with stuff, not necessarily of our choosing. Sunday was a run for Mom, followed by swimming lessons for the girls, with as small window for lunch before going to a festive art show birthday gathering for Riley's teacher.
After swimming, we may or may not on a regular basis, stop for a little Mickey D's. Today Riley wanted "chicken nuggets" (I use the term loosely), Kate did not. Mommy likes to do quality control on the french fries.
Festive party was very near a Whole Foods in our old pre kids neighborhood. After Kate, Jeff and I all picked out our healthy lunch choices loaded in compostable containers, we hit the cafe area to dine. I KNEW that Riley would want more of her lunch.. so I had 'hidden' it in my reusable grocery sack for just this moment. I put out the 2 chicken nuggets that were left onto a whole foods napkin, hoping it would blend in... and no sirens would go off or preservative/trans fat/bad for you stuff police would show up in sustainable hemp and bamboo outfits to confiscate our lunch. "I want the box Mommy!!" Why yes, of course you do.
I will not be judged by these people I boldly think to myself as I pull out the McDonalds Chicken Nugget box AND chocolate milk with red and yellow straw and settle it in front of her. These are community style tables and we were sharing ours with two older women.... and then it came.
I got it. The updown. The scowl. I kind of wished I was taking video of this. And then mentally decided I was taking the approach of this being a purposeful social experiment.
Yeah. Okay. (That's kind of the look Jeff gave me as I tried to get rid of all the left over french fry evidence in the car afterwards..)
Friday, May 1, 2009
Real People Who Do Really Nice Things
I was flying back from a work meeting in Dallas yesterday. I had changed my flight to an earlier one, so I had the 2nd to the last seat.... you know, the one where everyone stands with their butt in your face while waiting for the bathroom.
Oh and then there was the 5 year old who walked by on his way to try and make it to the bathroom to throw up, but the bathrooms were full. Sweet. My favorite. Puke in enclosed spaces. My (free!) bloody mary didn't go down so well after that.
BUT as we were settling into our seats, a couple in the row behind me and across the aisle, was buckling in with their 14 month old (under 2, kids can travel on your lap.) They looked kinda wiped out and were hunkering down for the 4 hour flight ahead. Across the row from them there were only two folks in the three seat row. A man and a woman who were not traveling together.
Totally unprompted, the man asks the couple if they'd like to trade and take the 3 seater so they could stretch out with their little one. The Mom practically cried and was so thankful. Eavesdropper that I am, I got huge lump in my throat listening to this exchange.
The woman goes on to say that they'd had a 9 hour delay of some kind in Dallas and all kinds of traveling issues. And it was her birthday. And this was the nicest thing that happened to her all day.
Me too.
Oh and then there was the 5 year old who walked by on his way to try and make it to the bathroom to throw up, but the bathrooms were full. Sweet. My favorite. Puke in enclosed spaces. My (free!) bloody mary didn't go down so well after that.
BUT as we were settling into our seats, a couple in the row behind me and across the aisle, was buckling in with their 14 month old (under 2, kids can travel on your lap.) They looked kinda wiped out and were hunkering down for the 4 hour flight ahead. Across the row from them there were only two folks in the three seat row. A man and a woman who were not traveling together.
Totally unprompted, the man asks the couple if they'd like to trade and take the 3 seater so they could stretch out with their little one. The Mom practically cried and was so thankful. Eavesdropper that I am, I got huge lump in my throat listening to this exchange.
The woman goes on to say that they'd had a 9 hour delay of some kind in Dallas and all kinds of traveling issues. And it was her birthday. And this was the nicest thing that happened to her all day.
Me too.
Friday, April 24, 2009
The Triple Threat
I've said it before. I love other people's stories. Love to hear them, love to tell them, love it. So I have to share one from my BFF this week.
Her 6 year old son is the cutest thing ever. He's sweet, quite handsome and is already premier league athlete material. As her neighbor says, for casting his high school future - 'the triple threat'.
He's also a bit of a Mama's boy. My BFF has quite an extensive network of neighborhood friends and she rarely has to get an official 'babysitter'. Usually it's just trade with her kids friends parents. Last week she had to resort to getting a real babysitter. A sweet, cute, local high schooler. Her son was beside himself. He was very stressed out. He didn't know this girl, he didn't want his Mom to leave. He wasn't having it.
She was feeling a bit badly about it and the next morning she asked her 9 year old how the evening went. Did her little brother do okay with the babysitter? Her daughter snorted and continued pouring her cereal. She says in a mature tone... "Please. 5 minutes after you left he was upstairs putting a 1/2 bottle of Dad's hair gel in his hair to impress the baby sitter". Nice. Love it. Starting Early.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Managing Hypochondria
I think the Red Dress Women's Heart Disease Campaign is working too well. The other night as I sat down to watch my pre recorded American Idol, my heart started racing and my arms felt numb. It was like I couldn't get a deep enough breath.
I tried not to panic and calmly told my husband that I didn't feel that great. This is never new news to him. My stomach is always the basis for much complaining and moaning and groaning. Particularly when associated with french fry eating (You need a shock collar! He tells me often.) I always have some sort of headache that makes me turn off his annoying 37 minute classic rock songs and I can't stand listening to the cat yowl in the evenings while I'm making dinner. (FYI screaming SHUT UP to a cat doesn't really work. Plus it's annoying to have to tell your kids those are not words we use in our family...)
These were all new crazy feelings. Luckily we're so used to being 'wired' that I didn't have to wait to see if I would make it through the night. I jumped on WebMD to check out my symptoms on the 'symptom checker'. I guess if you input anything having to do with difficulty breathing it all immediately goes to "proceed immediately to the nearest urgent care center". Oh. Yeah I didn't feel like I was dying enough to get off the couch and put on a bra and shoes. I remember the Dr. telling my Mom that if you're having a heart attack it will feel like someone is standing on your chest. Mine really felt more like Emerald Downs opening day in my chest.
Well I made it through the night and even worked out with my friend early the next morning and I didn't die then either. I did however make an appointment with my very nice Doctor.
Apparently I had an anxiety attack. Great - now I'm just like my high maintenance sensitive friend that I've often had to shake my head at. The one who I've had to talk down from crazy panic attacks in random places. The who has been on all kinds of prescription drugs over the past 10 years. No thanks. I'll pass.
My Doctor says patients have success with 'relaxation tapes'. Or another friend recommends meditative yoga. "Not the downward dog type yoga" she says. I headed home after picking up both girls from daycare and school respectively. Racing to start dinner so I could run out again for my once a quarter gathering with some old friends.
As I'm starting my harried journey, I see a sign for 'Buddhist Meditation Classes.'
That sign was definitely not there yesterday.
Hhhhmmmmmm.
I tried not to panic and calmly told my husband that I didn't feel that great. This is never new news to him. My stomach is always the basis for much complaining and moaning and groaning. Particularly when associated with french fry eating (You need a shock collar! He tells me often.) I always have some sort of headache that makes me turn off his annoying 37 minute classic rock songs and I can't stand listening to the cat yowl in the evenings while I'm making dinner. (FYI screaming SHUT UP to a cat doesn't really work. Plus it's annoying to have to tell your kids those are not words we use in our family...)
These were all new crazy feelings. Luckily we're so used to being 'wired' that I didn't have to wait to see if I would make it through the night. I jumped on WebMD to check out my symptoms on the 'symptom checker'. I guess if you input anything having to do with difficulty breathing it all immediately goes to "proceed immediately to the nearest urgent care center". Oh. Yeah I didn't feel like I was dying enough to get off the couch and put on a bra and shoes. I remember the Dr. telling my Mom that if you're having a heart attack it will feel like someone is standing on your chest. Mine really felt more like Emerald Downs opening day in my chest.
Well I made it through the night and even worked out with my friend early the next morning and I didn't die then either. I did however make an appointment with my very nice Doctor.
Apparently I had an anxiety attack. Great - now I'm just like my high maintenance sensitive friend that I've often had to shake my head at. The one who I've had to talk down from crazy panic attacks in random places. The who has been on all kinds of prescription drugs over the past 10 years. No thanks. I'll pass.
My Doctor says patients have success with 'relaxation tapes'. Or another friend recommends meditative yoga. "Not the downward dog type yoga" she says. I headed home after picking up both girls from daycare and school respectively. Racing to start dinner so I could run out again for my once a quarter gathering with some old friends.
As I'm starting my harried journey, I see a sign for 'Buddhist Meditation Classes.'
That sign was definitely not there yesterday.
Hhhhmmmmmm.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Galavanting in Swimsuits with Adults You Don't Know
This weekend I realized that I officially am not in tune with the 'vibe' of my daughter's school. Like when you're dating and realize it's just not going to work. Seriously.
I can't do any of the events, meetings, reading help, egg carton gathering, coffee hours etc... (and the etc is lengthy) at her school, because they all happen WHILE I'M WORKING. I realized too late, that I am in the severe minority of this school community - being a woman who works in an office, full time. (And apparently not many wear high heels either, because some child asked me why I was wearing those shoes? Umm.. why are you wearing that sweatshirt? Because you want to!) But as usual, I digress.
Since I cannot often help out or participate in the school events, when they have the "Family Fun Outings" I feel it necessary to go. I have to at least make an effort to be involved, lest I be a total leper. Last month we ice skated (and I had to reintroduce myself to most everyone). I couldn't participate the month before in sledding because it happened with a week's notice. On a Friday. At 11AM. While I was WORKING.
So this weekend was a Family Swim Outing. I should have clued in that it was a 'Family' Swim Outing. Apparently I hang with crowd of Mom's with a totally different mind set. I assumed since Kate could swim without assistance, that only one of us would get into the pool to swim with Riley. Typically I do not CHOOSE to put on my swimsuit in April in front of a whole bunch of parents that I do not know and jump around. So I didn't bring mine. I was the ONLY LOSER MOM not in the pool!! Seriously! I felt like the biggest horses arse. Am I so selfish about my own issues that I wouldn't swim and frolick with my child?
Kate proceeded to be her solitary self and not swim with any of her friends.....and refused to swim with Jeff and Riley. So there is my lone 5 year old - in the deep pool all by herself. While her selfish mother wearing shoes NOT appropriate for the pool area watches on. I felt so stupid I even looked at purchasing a swimsuit from the lobby store....but I didn't feel $78 worth of ugly utilitarian swimsuit guilty.
One Dad asked me from the pool how come I was not swimming. I could think of no witty answer. The truth was all very selfish. I have to go to dinner at my in laws directly after this and didn't want to have wet hair and raccoon eyes? I'm still working on getting back in shape and didn't feel like having to show off all my jiggles to all those judging stay at home Mom's? None of those were appropriate.... I just laughed and stammered at a total loss for words. Hopefully it came off as mysterious. Maybe I have some hideous scar I can't bear to show. Yeah, okay probably not.
Lesson learned. Next time I'll be the one cannonballing and laughing and frolicking with my children. Why the hell didn't I do that? I just assumed the kids would all play together and the parents would chat and watch on like we do at swim lessons at this same pool. Thank goodness my awesome husband was of the same mindset and backed me up.... But I can't help wondering, are there bigger lessons for me here? Jeez!
I can't do any of the events, meetings, reading help, egg carton gathering, coffee hours etc... (and the etc is lengthy) at her school, because they all happen WHILE I'M WORKING. I realized too late, that I am in the severe minority of this school community - being a woman who works in an office, full time. (And apparently not many wear high heels either, because some child asked me why I was wearing those shoes? Umm.. why are you wearing that sweatshirt? Because you want to!) But as usual, I digress.
Since I cannot often help out or participate in the school events, when they have the "Family Fun Outings" I feel it necessary to go. I have to at least make an effort to be involved, lest I be a total leper. Last month we ice skated (and I had to reintroduce myself to most everyone). I couldn't participate the month before in sledding because it happened with a week's notice. On a Friday. At 11AM. While I was WORKING.
So this weekend was a Family Swim Outing. I should have clued in that it was a 'Family' Swim Outing. Apparently I hang with crowd of Mom's with a totally different mind set. I assumed since Kate could swim without assistance, that only one of us would get into the pool to swim with Riley. Typically I do not CHOOSE to put on my swimsuit in April in front of a whole bunch of parents that I do not know and jump around. So I didn't bring mine. I was the ONLY LOSER MOM not in the pool!! Seriously! I felt like the biggest horses arse. Am I so selfish about my own issues that I wouldn't swim and frolick with my child?
Kate proceeded to be her solitary self and not swim with any of her friends.....and refused to swim with Jeff and Riley. So there is my lone 5 year old - in the deep pool all by herself. While her selfish mother wearing shoes NOT appropriate for the pool area watches on. I felt so stupid I even looked at purchasing a swimsuit from the lobby store....but I didn't feel $78 worth of ugly utilitarian swimsuit guilty.
One Dad asked me from the pool how come I was not swimming. I could think of no witty answer. The truth was all very selfish. I have to go to dinner at my in laws directly after this and didn't want to have wet hair and raccoon eyes? I'm still working on getting back in shape and didn't feel like having to show off all my jiggles to all those judging stay at home Mom's? None of those were appropriate.... I just laughed and stammered at a total loss for words. Hopefully it came off as mysterious. Maybe I have some hideous scar I can't bear to show. Yeah, okay probably not.
Lesson learned. Next time I'll be the one cannonballing and laughing and frolicking with my children. Why the hell didn't I do that? I just assumed the kids would all play together and the parents would chat and watch on like we do at swim lessons at this same pool. Thank goodness my awesome husband was of the same mindset and backed me up.... But I can't help wondering, are there bigger lessons for me here? Jeez!
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